I woke up from my occasional nap yesterday and completely lost my sense of purpose. The norm may be to attribute it to a biological reaction to the disorientation from the body's typical circadian rhythm but I think there's more to it. I think there are two potential possibilities:

  1. My mind is clear and hence empty. This allows me to rid my thoughts of anything else that may prompt me to desire to perform specific activities (i.e. a recollection of the need to stay financially secure may motivate me to finish my responsibilities of work). In this sense, this expulsion of such clouds of judgment allow me to with clarity see beyond the tunnel vision of all subjective perspective and understand that regardless of whatever I do, it is all pointless in the end. In the grand scheme of things, it doesn't matter how positively or negatively I impact my surroundings, how I influence my immediate or extended circle because ultimately it all means little to nothing.

  2. My mind is clear and hence empty, empty from the necessities of life that I have to take care of within the short time span that I have left to experience and enjoy. Each of us assigns our individual lives our own sense of meaning and it is the individual responsibility to decide how much our lifespans' entirety we utilize meaningfully. The objective is not comprehension of our purpose within the cosmos but happiness, not ephemeral bouts of hedonistic pursuits but long-lasting content within the span of our lives, and the means to this end is to simply to do what keeps us truly happy within the short decades to century that we are fortunate to have.

The nap has either expanded my scope to see the futility of it all or has narrowed my scope to blind me from my ambitions, dreams and desires. Either way I think it's a very interesting state of mind to be in, and I'll definitely think about it more later.